Days 56-57 – Mind Your Language

At my therapy session on Wednesday, it was pointed out to me that the way I speak to myself is not helping to make my recovery any easier. Apparently I use a lot of absolute and negative expressions, such as “I can’t”, “I never”, “I always” and “it’s too hard”. And then my brain believes […]

Days 54-55 – Wired for Coupledom

I just read a long thread on cracked.com, after an article about why it sucks to be single. The article itself was fairly depressing, but the comments thread was a real downer. I found it pretty shocking how many people out there are so anti-relationship, and completely content to live out their days single. Of […]

Days 51-53 – Reprogramming the Glitch

In my last post I wrote about my “emotional glitch”; how random, emotionally non-provocative events cause me to feel inappropriately sad. I’ve been trying to find a way to reprogram this. I’m still not entirely sure why this happens, other than being especially sensitive to emotional triggers and having a higher emotional baseline than others […]

Days 49-50 – Emotional Glitch

Yesterday I was discussing with a friend “after breakup avoidance”; where you avoid places, situations, songs, etc, that remind you of your ex, as an attempt to avoid the negative feelings that these things bring up. Apparently this behaviour will actually prolong the heartache; the association with pain will be cemented and the things that you avoided will, […]

Days 47-48 – Clawing Back out of the Hole

Yesterday was one of the worst days yet. It was so disappointing for me after feeling like I’d made so much progress. I had to leave class early and I cried all the way home on the train. Try as I might to distract myself, the thoughts of ending my life were relentless. Sometimes I […]

Days 44-45 – Good Days/Bad Days

I’ve made it halfway through my 90 day challenge, so, do I feel that I’m halfway recovered? It depends when you ask me. There have been a few days where I felt like I don’t even have a problem anymore. And some days where I still feel like a have a long way to go. […]

Days 42-43 – Preconceptions & Expectations

Sometimes I think I’m doing so well. Sometimes I don’t. But one thing is for certain; my emotions are on a much more even keel than I’ve ever experienced before. It’s quite an odd feeling after a lifetime of jagged emotional peaks and troughs. So, while I have felt a little more down this past […]