Day 500 – Not Sticking is Not (Always) Weakness

Do I feel disappointed that what was intended as a 90 day challenge to overcome my “condition” has blown out to 500? Yes. But, I’m also proud of myself that even though it’s been a long journey, I have stuck with it. I’m still going, still working, still trying. I move forward and I slip […]

Day 490 – Getting to the Bottom of Things

Yesterday was a relatively good day, although I did feel pretty anxious about my upcoming birthday celebrations this weekend. I was upset about not being able to find anything to wear that I felt confident in, but also scared that people wouldn’t show up, in particular The Suit. This morning I awoke to a message […]

Day 431 – I Want to Eat the Whole Bag

I’m still dating The Suit, which frankly amazes me. I’m slowly revealing more about myself, and he hasn’t run away screaming yet. But, it’s something I’m still waiting for. Always waiting for. Always anxious about. And even though I should be happy that I’ve found someone I like who likes me back, the constant anxiety […]

Day 108 – Finding Myself so as not to Lose Myself

I want a relationship. Is that in itself a problem? I fear that the correct attitude should be “I’m happy the way things are and I am open to a relationship when I meet the person who inspires those feelings within me.” I fear that until I feel that way, the Universe will hold out on […]

Days 96-97 – Down up down

It’s funny, my mood still fluctuates quite a bit, but the range has changed. Some days I can’t believe how good I feel. On those days I feel like I’m just flowing with the Universe. I feel like everything is coming together for me, and I’m finally getting my reward for all the hard work […]

Day 95 – Unprocessed Emotions

I’m a little embarrassed about yesterday’s post, but what’s the point of having a blog if I am going to edit how I feel? It was a good example of posting about raw emotions that I hadn’t yet had time to process. I woke up today with the same feeling of, desperation I suppose. It […]